Ode to "Sex and the City"

The show is based on 4 single females, living and working in NYC. But if you've never seen this show please know that there is more to it than "sex." What I adore about this show is the friendship bond between the women and how unbreakable it is!

For example, 1 friend was involved in an adulterous relationship (calm down she got out of it), 1 became a jew to marry a man, 1 kept going back to a man just to get hurt all over again (Richard Wright), and another was judgemental of ALL things. But through all of the "drama" the friendships never broke. They loved each other through their faults and flaws, and, additionally, they didn't judge one another, instead, they supported all decisions.

Well, recently, a good friend of mine got married (she knows who she is, LOL) and she not only invited me, but she allowed me to bring a guest! Not only was I allowed to bring a guest, but I was also asked to read a poem and YOU ALL KNOW WHERE MY MIND WENT RIGHT??? "Carrie's Poem" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1P-SNidWTbE and what was great was this: "his phone didn't ring and he didn't walk out/away" LOL side joke, anyhow, this is my ODE to SATC, and I look fwd to the sequal in May 2010.

Enjoy your girlfriends ladies, especially if they're in your front row. Cherish it b/c women and friendships is very hard to come by in 2009, lovely day!

Let me just get right down to it, LOL.

You see, not all men are deadbeat dads. Not all men cheat on their wives.

Not all fathers forsake their families, some families as a whole forsake the father for mistakes made (I say mistake(s) which we all make daily, right)? As Carrie so eloquently said in SATC the movie – “it’s all about forgiveness” Or, how about this one, “If you want to know how a man will treat his woman, look at how he treats his mom,” but what about looking at the way a woman treats (clears throat) her dad?

Well, fathers, this one is for you. And in case you’re reading this wondering, is she biased – INDEED I am. I have 1 father, and 2 brothers who are the worlds greatest. Don’t get me wrong now, my mom is the best (R.I.P.) and I hope everyone feels that way of their mom, however, women get shine all the time, but men…positive shine…not so much, especially those men w/some color so here we go, you ready?

Happy Father’s day (in advance) to you! May you enjoy this weekend with recognition for playing an active role in your child or children’s lives.

The Art of Friendship

Recently legally downloaded Raheem DeVaughn's latest mixCD - "the Art of Noise" and it immediately made me think of my frienships for some reason...

Years ago I received an email about friendships and movie theaters: everyone doesn't get a front row seat, reposition when necessary, don't feel bad for having to make transitions in your relationships.

Well, daily I'm thankful for the friendships I currently have and even the friendships I once had, they all serve a purpose to progressing who I am in this life. Push, pull, stress, hard work, that doesn't make up my friendships, in face, they're all a walk in the park. The moment it becomes a strain to my character and who I am...theater seat transitions take place, LOL.

Here are just a few ingredients of my frienships (thanks you all):

- NO JUDGEMENT
- the simplicity of communication
- mutual understanding, or basic agreements to disagree
- no babysitting, we don't have to talk daily, like spirits "catch on"
- being what each other needs at different times
- the openness to being teachable (at any point in life)
- clear understanding of seasons, timing, and purpose

Those are just a few ingredients of the art of 'my' friendships. I must say, my friends have taught me so much, especially, what a friend truly is, in my sense of the word.

NOTE: some TV shows that model functional friendships are - Sex and the City, the Cosby Show, Girlfriends, and "Friends" to name a few

I encourage you to evaluate your friendships today, are they all necessary, do you have any, and finally, is it true...

HIV Testing - Take 1

I have been certified to administer HIV testing for about one year now, and yesterday was "take 1" for me.

It's amazing what empathy can do. I recall being the person to get tested for HIV every 6 months. Placing your emotions in the shoe of the other person creates a safe space. A safe space creates communication and with that, truth.

It's very important to be able to speak in truth when taking a test such as an HIV test. As I tested, I couldn't help but to think about the courage it takes to simply KNOW YOUR STATUS.

I am proud to say, no matter what the outcome b/c knoledge truly is power and a directory for that path that's necessary to take due to the outcome, that I assisted in others knowing their status.

Takes 2 - infinity are coming up shortly....KNOW YOUR STATUS!

Sincerely, Dad.

My father, what can I say about him? Thanks to him I know what it means to love. My father has always been consistent in his messages: above all, RESPECT.

On yesterday, my father told me there are three things you want to do as it refers to men:

1) don’t try and change a man
2) don’t move anything w/out asking them
3) I don’t know the 3rd one but I’ll get back to you.

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus is so true. We are all different and unique in our own ways, however, when we try to change a person that’s when we try on shoes that just don’t fit us. God doesn’t even force us to do anything, so how do we, as humans, believe that we can change anyone outside of ourselves?

Today, I say, let’s respect, above all, meaning, appreciate people for who they are and where they are at the time.

♥LOVE♥

So what is love to you?

This hit me hard just yesterday as I thought about how we treat one another as humans. We can learn so much from the animal kingdom. For example, cats and dogs are quick to lick the wounds of one another but humans are quicker to deepen them. The priority for an animal is healing for a human....not so much.

Let's begin this weekend with sober thinking, considering the heart of a matter or another person for that matter. I'll end this very brief morning blog w/this Scripture:

of true freedom. If you bite and ravage each other, watch out—in no time at all you will be annihilating each other, and where will your precious freedom be then?

Courtesy of: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians%205:13;&version=65;

Galatians 5:13 (The Message) It is absolutely clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don't use this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that's how freedom grows. For everything we know about God's Word is summed up in a single sentence: Love others as you love yourself. That's an act of true freedom. If you bite and ravage each other, watch out—in no time at all you will be annihilating each other, and where will your precious freedom be then?

the "India Arie" Experience

I have waited 2 whole years to see India Arie Live in concert and all 730+ days were worth it! The show took place in Virginia on Monday May 4, 2009 and I'm still basking in the remains of it's energy.

Evening began with the soulful singing of Laura Izibor - you know her "from my heart to yours" if you're a Starbucks finatic, then you definitely know her. She was one of their featured iTunes download of the week! She definitely set the atmosphere for the night.

And then, there was Miss India...what can we say. Pure, gentle, spiritual, in tune, quiet yet strong all at the same time. She came onstage just after we did a "waving of the phones" in the dark using our phone screens as the light, beautiful.

She said a prayer to begin, discussing a challenging day she had, and then it all started - THE MUSIC!!!! Everything from Brown Skin, to Yellow, to my favorite Brandy Song "He Is!" She even walked around the room, sang, and stood in MY CHAIR to dance and sing w/the crowd - classic! To sum it all up, how do you know God is real was adlibbed (sp) by her two powerful background singers, taking us all to another level of spirituality, peace, serenity, and self awareness.

The show changed my life. "The worse disease in the world: is not cancer, its not AIDS....hate is the worse disease in the world and the cure to hate, is LOVE" taken from "The Cure" from her latest album "Testimony Vol. 2: Love & Politics."

India Arie, thank you for allowing your "gift" to be used and shared to us all.