Let me just get right down to it, LOL.

You see, not all men are deadbeat dads. Not all men cheat on their wives.

Not all fathers forsake their families, some families as a whole forsake the father for mistakes made (I say mistake(s) which we all make daily, right)? As Carrie so eloquently said in SATC the movie – “it’s all about forgiveness” Or, how about this one, “If you want to know how a man will treat his woman, look at how he treats his mom,” but what about looking at the way a woman treats (clears throat) her dad?

Well, fathers, this one is for you. And in case you’re reading this wondering, is she biased – INDEED I am. I have 1 father, and 2 brothers who are the worlds greatest. Don’t get me wrong now, my mom is the best (R.I.P.) and I hope everyone feels that way of their mom, however, women get shine all the time, but men…positive shine…not so much, especially those men w/some color so here we go, you ready?

Happy Father’s day (in advance) to you! May you enjoy this weekend with recognition for playing an active role in your child or children’s lives.

The Art of Friendship

Recently legally downloaded Raheem DeVaughn's latest mixCD - "the Art of Noise" and it immediately made me think of my frienships for some reason...

Years ago I received an email about friendships and movie theaters: everyone doesn't get a front row seat, reposition when necessary, don't feel bad for having to make transitions in your relationships.

Well, daily I'm thankful for the friendships I currently have and even the friendships I once had, they all serve a purpose to progressing who I am in this life. Push, pull, stress, hard work, that doesn't make up my friendships, in face, they're all a walk in the park. The moment it becomes a strain to my character and who I am...theater seat transitions take place, LOL.

Here are just a few ingredients of my frienships (thanks you all):

- NO JUDGEMENT
- the simplicity of communication
- mutual understanding, or basic agreements to disagree
- no babysitting, we don't have to talk daily, like spirits "catch on"
- being what each other needs at different times
- the openness to being teachable (at any point in life)
- clear understanding of seasons, timing, and purpose

Those are just a few ingredients of the art of 'my' friendships. I must say, my friends have taught me so much, especially, what a friend truly is, in my sense of the word.

NOTE: some TV shows that model functional friendships are - Sex and the City, the Cosby Show, Girlfriends, and "Friends" to name a few

I encourage you to evaluate your friendships today, are they all necessary, do you have any, and finally, is it true...

HIV Testing - Take 1

I have been certified to administer HIV testing for about one year now, and yesterday was "take 1" for me.

It's amazing what empathy can do. I recall being the person to get tested for HIV every 6 months. Placing your emotions in the shoe of the other person creates a safe space. A safe space creates communication and with that, truth.

It's very important to be able to speak in truth when taking a test such as an HIV test. As I tested, I couldn't help but to think about the courage it takes to simply KNOW YOUR STATUS.

I am proud to say, no matter what the outcome b/c knoledge truly is power and a directory for that path that's necessary to take due to the outcome, that I assisted in others knowing their status.

Takes 2 - infinity are coming up shortly....KNOW YOUR STATUS!

Sincerely, Dad.

My father, what can I say about him? Thanks to him I know what it means to love. My father has always been consistent in his messages: above all, RESPECT.

On yesterday, my father told me there are three things you want to do as it refers to men:

1) don’t try and change a man
2) don’t move anything w/out asking them
3) I don’t know the 3rd one but I’ll get back to you.

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus is so true. We are all different and unique in our own ways, however, when we try to change a person that’s when we try on shoes that just don’t fit us. God doesn’t even force us to do anything, so how do we, as humans, believe that we can change anyone outside of ourselves?

Today, I say, let’s respect, above all, meaning, appreciate people for who they are and where they are at the time.